Speeding Lights
by DeathByShyKid
Summary: It's tragedy and disbelief that hurt us worse than the emotions that lie deep within our hearts. ((Based on a true story. Based on a personal experience. Characters are being supplemented for real-life people.))


**A/N – This story is based on something that I went through. I have suffered, as the counselors have told me, PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) from a tragic event. They have requested for me to find some way for me to cope with witnessing something like this. I have chosen to write a fanfiction about it. Characters from Naruto will supplement real-life people.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto in any shape or form.**

* * *

"What time is it?" Temari asked, frantically throwing things into her lunch box.

I looked at my older sister, shrugging my shoulder, "I dunno."

She sighed, "You are so annoying sometimes, Kankuro."

Rolling my eyes, I grabbed my phone from the table, "It's 6:28."

"What?!"

"Shh!" I scolded.

She reached out and grabbed my wrist, tugging me towards the door, "We should have been outside three minutes ago!"

"C'mon, Temari, you know that the bus doesn't get to the house until 6:33." I laughed, receiving a punch to the shoulder.

"Whatever." She looked away, releasing her hold from my wrist once we had stepped outside. The blond-haired girl walked ahead, standing with her arms crossed in our driveway. I strolled up behind her with a shit-eating grin on my face. Temari peeked at me behind narrowed eyes, "What?"

"I have this fanfiction idea about gay boys, wanna hear it?" I chuckled.

She sputtered, giving a small smile, "No thanks. You always take too long."

"Man." I snapped as if my plans had been thwarted.

My seventeen-year-old sister looked at the sky, "I can't wait until we get some more warm weather."

I nodded enthusiastically, "Yeah, I'm tired of all this cold stuff."

"At least we're getting more sunlight now that daylight savings time has passed," Temari stated, rolling on her heels.

The whirling sound made us look to the left, seeing yellowish lights start to come our way. Instinctively, we both check our phone.

"Hm." I raised an eyebrow, "She's late."

"This is like the fifth time she's been late this month." Temari huffed, "If it happens one more time, I'm telling the office."

I scoffed just as the bus was starting to stop, "Sure you are."

The yellow bus, bus numbered one-zero-four, stopped at the strip of grass in between two houses: mine and my neighbors. Since the beginning of the year, the bus administrators made Temari, the kid from next door, and myself walk across this strip of grass to get on the bus.

So, we walked.

And Temari complained.

"I hate this." She mumbled under her breath.

I laughed, smirking like an idiot, "Walking to get on the bus?"

"Yes!" She groaned, "Why do we have to do it anyway?!"

"You and I already know the answer so stop complaining." I laughed. The kid from next door – some guy named Lee, I think – walked up the bus steps first, followed by myself, and then Temari. Ms. Terumi – the bus driver – smiled and greeted us with a good morning. I nodded to her, hearing Temari walking up the steps of the bus. Strolling down the aisle, trying not to bump into anyone sitting near the aisle, I spotted a friend of mine in the fifth seat. I smiled, throwing my backpack off and sitting down beside Konan in one swift movement. "Hey." I greeted her.

She looked up at her phone, a picture of an alpaca clearly being displayed, "What's up?"

"Nothing much." I shrugged my shoulder, pulling out my phone and earbuds.

"Cool." Konan gave me a nod before curling in on her backpack, getting ready to fall asleep.

I watched Temari sit down in front of me beside Nagato, her best friend this year. The bus started rolling again, stopping once more down this road. I put my earbuds in, plugging it into my phone. I scrolled through my favorites playlist before deciding on a French song by a singer-songwriter named Stromae. He is a god. The music continued for a while as I stared ahead of me. Whenever we'd stop, I'd look up from my phone and glance at Ms. Terumi. She looked out one of the windows in her area before signaling the kids to get on the bus. I always followed her sight, watching at my bus mates climbed the steps on the bus and taking a seat. It was like some feral instinct that I needed to watch what was happening around me.

Around 6: 46 was when we pulled up to this boy's stop. I followed my mental tick of knowing what happens and looked up at the bus driver. She opened the window beside her, sticking her hand out and waving for the boy to start making his way across the street to get on the bus. I followed her gaze and stared out the window.

I wished I hadn't.

A car was coming and he didn't look like he was going to stop.

And he didn't.

I saw that poor kid's body fly against the window, a clear look of terror on his face. The shadows from the coming sun made the look all the more petrifying. The car hit the bus, making a loud screeching noise that I could hear even with my earbuds in. I tell myself that what I saw what either a trick of the light or that it wasn't a student.

I wish I were correct.

Ms. Terumi gave a cry, sticking her head out of the open window. Tears are in her eyes, "NO! OH GOD NO!" Her hands are shaking as she puts the bus into park. There is a slam of a car door and some yelling. I've already taken out my earbuds, the sights and sounds echoing in my ears. "SOMEONE CALL 9-1-1!" The bus driver frantically yells. Several of the students already have their phones out. I'm one of them, but I just can't seem to get a signal right now.

The crying in front of me makes the world stop. The hyperventilating of my older sister enters my ears. It is no time for me to deal with my emotions. I've got to do something to help Temari or else she'll have a panic attack. Nagato is giving me a look, one that is desperate for help as he is cradling a sobbing blond. I stand up and my head instantly turns towards where a broken, battered, and bloodied body lay.

I wish I knew his name.

I turn away from the scene, knowing that the image will forever be burned into my mind. I rub my sister's shoulders, mentally preparing myself to push everything I'm feeling right now to the back of my mind. My sister needs me right now. I can't let her see me break. It'll only make things worse. I look to the red-haired teenager holding my sister as she cries. "Nagato." I start, "Swap places with Temari, make sure she doesn't look out the opposite windows." He nods and whispers to Temari some simple instructions. I sit back down beside Konan.

"You okay?" She whispers to me as Temari closes in on herself beside the window. Nagato is whispering calming words to her, none of which enter her ears.

"Yes." There is nothing more I _can_ say. I feel so emotionless, now that I've thrown away my personal feelings.

"AMBULANCES ARE ON THEIR WAY!" Someone from the back shouts out.

"You hear that," Nagato hugs his best friend, "Ambulances are coming. He's going to be fine."

"Oh god… oh my god…" Temari kept whispering those few words, repeatedly, cradling herself.

I wish that there was more I could do.

"Nagato, are you okay?" A new voice appeared behind me.

The red-head turned to look at Yahiko, kissing his cheek, "Y-Yeah, I'm fine. You?"

"I've been doing better." He looked at Temari, "How is she?" He gave me a look. I just shook my head. "Oh…" Yahiko whispered.

I looked over at my sister. Her eyes were wide and she couldn't breathe properly. We'd just been informed that we weren't allowed to leave the scene. Another bus couldn't get us and the area hasn't been cleared enough for us to leave. We were stuck here. I poked Yahiko, Nagato, and Konan. They gave me a look. I leaned in, "We need to distract her. She's going to have a panic attack soon if we don't do anything."

We sat in silence for a moment.

"What if we play twenty questions?" Someone suggested.

"Sounds good enough." I shook my sister's shoulder. She glanced at me before shutting her eyes. "Temari, we're going to play a game. Each of us will ask you a question. Breathe in and then say your answer when you breathe out. Okay?" She nodded.

"Favorite color?" Konan asked, leaning against the bus seats.

Temari was silent for a second, trying to get her breathing under control just to answer a simple question. She breathed in. "O-O-Oran…ge…" She exhaled.

"Okay, favorite country?" I asked, even though I already knew the answer.

Stuttered inhale. "Rus-s-sia." Exhale.

"North or South?" Nagato supplied, giving everyone a confused face. He obviously had no idea what to ask.

Inhale. "S-South…" Stuttered exhale. A sob.

"Daytime or nighttime?" Yahiko asked.

Tears fell from her eyes. This wasn't working. "N-Night… t-t-time…" Exhale.

"Pencil or pen?" I was trying anything to get her to calm down.

Inhale. "P-Pen…" Exhale.

"Sun or the moon?"

"M-Moon…"

"Rain or snow?"

"Rain…"

"Light or dark?"

"Light…"

"Beach or pool?"

"Pool."

Her hyperventilating had finally stopped. The four of us gave each other a sigh of relief. Silently high-fiving, we smiled. Ms. Terumi nodded at us, tears still in her eyes.

I sat back in my seat as an administrator from the school walked onto the bus. He told us that this was now the time to call our parents and tell them that another bus will grab us soon. However, we'd be taken to the school and the parents need to take us home. I looked to Temari, "I'll call mom."

No answer.

I tried again, but there was nothing.

"Temari!" Nagato's exasperated voice filled my ears. I looked up from my phone again. Temari's hand is shaking as she holds a phone to her ear, tears falling from her eyes. She quickly ended the call and sobbed into her arms.

"Oh my gosh, Temari, what happened?!" I was honestly shocked. I looked at the redhead, "What happened?"

"I'm not sure!" He frantically said.

I shook my older sister's shoulder, "What happened?" She turned her head and proceeded to tell me that our father yelled at her when she tried to explain the situation to him. Red filled my eyes as I dialed my father's number. It rang twice before it connected. "What is wrong with you?" I stated as calmly as I could manage.

"What?"

"Why on earth would you yell at Temari when she was just trying to tell you that something terrible happened?!" My anger was slowly getting to me, "You know just as well as I do that she does not deal with these situations as well as you and I!"

"What the hell are you talking about?!" He said.

"A kid was hit with a car, dad. He was walking across the street to get on the bus when it happened." I explained, getting looks from the other kids on the bus.

The other line went silent for a second or two. "Kankuro, how is Temari?" He asked quietly, "Is she okay?"

"No, dad, she's not. Though, we managed to get her to stop having a panic attack." I scoffed, "That was until you yelled at her."

"I did not _yell_ at her. I was yelling at Gaara and the dogs. They were being extremely loud. I couldn't hear Temari because she was crying too much." My father said, trying to justify what he did.

I narrowed my eyes, "You know just as well as I do that you do not _yell_ when Temari is having a panic attack."

"Kankuro, I-"

"Look, we aren't at the school right now. They wanted me to inform you that you _must_ pick us up from the school. The administrators won't let us go through the school day after this." I stated, starting to cool down as my anger subsided, "I've got to go and help Temari. Call me if anything comes up. Love you, bye." The call ended.

I try not to look out the side windows for there is blood dripping from it. I take a deep breath, opening my phone back up. I need to distract myself. Nagato can handle Temari for a while. I need to get my emotions back under control. I stare at the notification bar at the top of my phone. I can see that I have a few messages from my boyfriend, Naruto. Clicking on the bar, my messaging app appeared before me.

' _Hey, where are you?'_ 7:15 a.m. This is when first period begins. I checked the time. It's about 8:30 in the morning now.

' _Babe'_ 7:18 a.m.

' _Is everything ok?'_ 7:19 a.m.

' _I heard something happened from some of the kids here.'_ 7:22 a.m.

' _You ride bus 104, right?'_ 7:26 a.m.

' _Babe, are you okay?'_ 7:33 a.m.

' _What happened?'_ 7:35 a.m.

' _Talk to me.'_ 7:38 a.m.

' _Nvm, I heard what happened.'_ 7:51 a.m.

' _I know the guy who got hit…'_ 8:06 a.m.

' _He's in band with me…'_ 8:07 a.m.

' _Did you see what happened?'_ 8:17 a.m.

My phone is shaking in my hands by now. I looked up at the chaos surrounding me except everything has gone silent. It's like everything is slowing down. My sister is still crying. Nagato is holding her so tight. His boyfriend is rubbing his back. The two are strong, but I feel that their walls will break. Konan has been awfully quiet. And me? I don't know what to feel. I feel empty and helpless. I stare at my phone again. Naruto needs an answer. He gets scared when I don't answer.

' _ **Yes.'**_

What a stupid answer. I scoff at my own idiocy.

' _Omg…'_

' _ **Yeah.'**_

Why do I have to have such stupid answers?

' _Did you see it happen?'_

' _ **Yeah.'**_

' _I don't know how to feel…'_

My stomach churns.

' _ **You okay, babe?'**_

' _Yeah… for the most part… He's a really good friend of mine.'_

Dammit.

' _Best friend even…'_

FUCK!

' _It's ok…'_

I need to know.

' _ **What was his name?'**_

' _Sasuke Uchiha.'_

' _ **If you need to talk, we can talk. I'll always be there for you.'**_

I internally laugh at myself. The trauma I sustained… why am I telling him that he can talk to me about it when I don't even want to talk about it myself.

' _I do… just… not now…'_

' _ **Okay, call you later then?'**_

It's all I could say to him… or text, I mean.

' _Yeah… ttyl.'_

' _ **I love you, Naruto.'**_

' _Love you too. Thank you.'_

' _ **You're welcome.'**_

I stare at my phone for about five minutes, seeing if he'd text back. My heart is starting to fall in on itself. It's okay though, as long as I don't cry. It is not the time for me to bring forth the waterworks. Not when I should try and calm everyone else down. My tsunami of emotions and trauma must hit another day. I'm not going to deal with it right now.

Three hours.

Three hours that we'd been sitting on that bus with blood on it.

Three hours that we'd been sitting beside the scene of a crime.

Sasuke Uchiha had already been taken to the hospital two and a half hours ago. However, since the bus was a part of the crime scene neither the students nor the bus driver could leave. The vice principal was here on the bus too. He was helping Ms. Terumi try and get another bus to get us evacuated. It wouldn't be here for another thirty minutes. It was starting to get hot on the bus.

I looked over at my sister. Her eyes looked dead, red-rimmed, and blank. She'd cried too much for her own good. If Temari had cried anymore, I would have thought that she'd been dehydrated. The bus had finally quieted down, the lack of emotions and conversation suffocating me. My instincts told me to tell a joke to lighten the mood but I knew that wouldn't work. I'd either be scolded for making light of a serious situation or it wouldn't work. Both options scared me.

So, I just kept my mouth shut.

I feel the need to go back over what happened, but I'm too scared to revisit it. To relive it. My eyes drift back over to the bloodied window across from me. I gulp down a lump in my throat as the vice principal hugs Ms. Terumi. She was crying again. I looked at her, envy in my eyes. I wish I wasn't so strong. I sometimes wish that I was spineless. I wish to release the hold on my emotions. They are suffocating me, drowning me in despair. I don't know what to do. I have no idea what to feel. Though, one common thing is that I have to be strong. Not for myself but for her. For Temari. Even though she's three years older than me, we have found equal grounds. She needs me now more than ever and while I know that I could have done more to help her, I know that Temari is happy to have me. She's already said it before and I don't think she'd like to repeat herself.

"Alright everyone." The vice principal's deep and loud voice alerted the students on the bus that instructions were about to be given out, "The evacuation bus is finally here. However, you have a walk a little bit to get on it. I ask that no one look behind you as you walk." His old eyes looked across the bus of high schoolers before settling on me. "You are her brother, correct?" The old man asked, pointing at Temari.

"Yes, sir," I said.

"Good. I want you to hide her from the windows and direct her towards the bus. You will be her guide. Do not let her see what happened." He stated sternly.

"Yes, sir." I nodded. The adults knew that Temari had taken it the hardest.

"Alright, everyone. Let's get you home." His voice was sober as he walked off the bus. I stood up along with the two-dozen other high schoolers. Nagato left the seat with Yahiko and Konan. I moved up one seat, letting the numbers trickle away before attempting to get Temari out of the seat and towards the evacuation bus.

"Temari?" I whispered, holding my hand out, "Do you trust me?"

She looked up, tears in her eyes, "Y-Yes."

"Okay, come on." She took my hand as I helped her stand, "You still trust me?"

"Yeah."

"Then close your eyes. I'll tell you when we get to the steps." Temari's hand tightened around mine as she shut her eyes. She started to shake. I gave a sober smile, "You've got this." I directed her towards the steps of the bus. A small rub on the shoulder alerted to me that Ms. Terumi was giving me a sad thumbs-up and a thank you. I nodded to her. "Okay, Temari, we're at the steps. I'm going to ask you to open your eyes as you are stepping down." I looked to her as she opened her eyes, "You've got this."

"O-Okay." She nodded dumbly, continuing to hold my hand will the other gripped the metal handlebar as she descended.

Once our feet hit the grass, I stood in front of her, "Okay, do you still trust me?"

"I do."

"Close your eyes again. I'm going to walk you to the other bus. Are you okay with that?" I wrapped one of my arms around her shoulders, pulling her head towards my chest.

"Yeah…" She closed her eyes, still shaking.

We started to walk. I could see that it was going to take about four or five minutes to get to the other bus. There were ambulances and cop cars on either side of the road that had been closed off about an hour ago. As I walked my sister blindly towards the other bus, I stared at the officers who were leaning against the vehicles. They gave me a nod or thumbs up. I nodded back to them all. It was like they were telling me that I did a good job.

I don't feel the same.

Once we were at the half-way point from bus one-zero-four and our evacuation bus, I looked behind me. I wanted to make sure that Temari wouldn't be able to see the carnage left behind. There was still blood on the street and the damage could still be seen. I narrowed my eyes. "Temari, I'm going to ask for you to open your eyes but you must promise me that you won't look back. Can you do that?" I stated.

She nodded, opening her eyes and looking ahead, "Okay…"

"Promise me that you won't look back," I stated.

"I promise that I won't look back." She repeated.

"You're only going to stare forward?"

"Yes, I will." Temari nodded.

I gave her a small smile, "Are you going to be okay if I let you go?"

"Can I still hold your hand?" She whispered.

I nodded, "Yeah." I released her from the hug-like hold and opted to just hold her hand as we reached the evacuation bus. She asked if we could sit together where she hugged me tightly the whole ride to the school where our father was waiting for us.

It wasn't until later that day when I found out that the kid who was hit with that car – Sasuke Uchiha – had died.

The wake of tears that came afterward from the community will never be forgotten.

I would know.

I see if every time I close my eyes.

And there was nothing I could have done to prevent it.

Worthless.


End file.
